10/28/11

Right now I am being faced with what will be probably one of the hardest decisions of my life.
Between my boyfriend and my family.

I could sit here and try to put together the pro's and con's of the situation, but I don't really think that will be too productive.

My boyfriend and I have been through 9 months of emotional and trust issues. However, he is the first man I've been with that knows me better than I know myself. He helps me through the turmoil and the problems I face. However, my family does not like him, they refuse to meet him or see him mainly because of his anger management/emotional issues. They believe him to be a danger to me and my family. WHICH I understand why they feel that way.

But doens't it matter how I feel?

I dont want to pick between the two people that I love.


Im so stressed it is making me sick.
My options are.
1) leave the man I love, and loose my second family, be alone
2) loose my family, not just my family, but the support of my family, and be on my own finanacially and emotionally

I dont know what to do.
Im so stressed it is making me sick.

8/11/11

I haven't updated my blog in a very long time, but I have decided to start it up as much as possible again.

Everything is going so well right now, I am in a happy and healthy realtionship
I am loosing weight and becoming a MUCH happier person, all in al......
Life is going super duper awesome right now.

I now work at Fredricks of Hollywood, which I am enjoying SO much.



What else....I have a new song obession...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pq-yP7mb8UE&ob=av3e

amazing song <3


I am trying to get back into dancing and singing again....once schol starts I will be taking a voice and a dance class, which will be so much fun and I am so excited.

At the end of august, I will be auditioning for the Voice :]

Which I am SO excited for.


That is about it....

Right now.

Right now I am happy.
I am getting ready to embark on a new journey of community college and apartment living.
I have an amazing boyfriend, who gets me more than anyone.



excuse his rediculous sunglasses -.-
anywho, I am just a little bit dissapointed about this school. i wanted to go to this place SO bad. it was the school of my dreams....and then i found out that they lied about me being able to major in what i wanted to major in here, i felt like i have wasted a year here...
yes, i've gained maturity otu of this,
but this school is so expensive, and I did not do anything that made me happy this year.
The one thing that kept me going here was choir, and that got cancelled.

Hopefuly this next year will be great.

goodnight.

3.2.2011

In the past two weeks, I have developed a new found confidance for myself.
something i haven't had in a long time.
i've been eating better, working out, and trying to stay more positive.
I've been being honest to people, and by doing that I made friends.
I know what i am going to do next year.
I guess....all in all I am finally content with myself.

I'm becoming someone who is more positive, and motivated.
I want to do well, I want to succeed.
The sad thing is, it took someone special to me to tell me that.

I've messed up in the past, but from this day forward I am prepared to be the best person I can be.
:]
Time for class!

Byeeeee

this is haloween this is haloween....

HAPPY HALOWEEEN :]
or as my little brother says, "merry haloween......"
haha.


so jayson and i dressed up as Bella and Edward from Twlight (yuck)...but hey..i got to splash my boyfriend in glitter....what more can a girl ask for :] <3



how cute :]


I miss home alot, there have been times where i wish i could just drive home and see my family. its different being away.
not living at home anymore, i've started to realize how good i had it when i lived at home.
for about 2 years before i moved out, i never wanted to be at home...i was miserable, and just wanted to be out of the hosue..under no control whatsoever....
now i wihs i had my mom and dad around the corner so i could come get a hug, or ask them for help..instead of having to find stupid reception up on campus...just to call my mom to say hi and i miss her..

:/

well i miss you mom and dad <3

especially this :]



looove you dADDY :]


byee:]

what day is it? seven

i've been trying really hard to keep up on these things..
but everything is so busy busy busy right now..
i've been forgetting (i'm sorry dad!!!)


here is an update on everything :]

School is going great..my roomate and i are getting along much better....and by that i guess i mean that we don't want to shoot eachother...its more of a strangle feeling.
i'm sure it will get better soon.

Jayson and I are great. Saturday marks a month we've been togehter. :]
wewt.


uhmmmm. i don't know what else to update on..
i havent dranken a redbull in about 2 weeks now.
i'm very proud of myslef.

yellow gatorade is my new thing :]

<3
thats is for noww

Much Love,
:}

here you go daddy!

so i wrote this whole blog.
and it got deleted cause internet problems.

seriously?
thats obnoxious
sorry daddy.


im really don't wanna redo it

but i love you <3

today.

A lot of things are going right for me right now. I’m getting along with my family, I have an great relationship, classes are going well, I love the college I’m at, and I am finally comfortable with myself and the way that I look and feel.
It’s funny…all throughout elementary school, middle school, and high school…I was the outcast. I didn’t have that many friends, and I was not good at making new ones. When I got into American Jewish University, I was excited but scared. I knew I was going have to make new friends. I was so scared…But I never thought that it would be this easy. The first day I got here, I made so many friends…more friends than I’ve had at one time in my whole life. It makes me so happy (:

Well it happened everyone. I got my first ticket today ]: I was super scared, but I think I was more scared as to how my parents would react…
So I called my mother BAWLING my eyes out, and she was like okay, we’ll take care of it….then I was like…Dad’s going to be mad D:
She just called me back and told me I have nothing to worry about, my dad isn’t mad.
At least it wasn’t a speeding ticket right?

Well here is my new favorite song :]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-lLvtydTM78&feature=related

really bad at remembering this....

I know, I know...I haven't blogged in a while.

BUT I promised my lovely father that I would blog for him...
now, it may not be every day...but every couple days I think is a good deal (:

Last week, I made a surprise visit to my family!
I came home for the night...and my daddy looked SO CONFUSED!

but all in all, it was great seeing the family!
:]


i think thats it for tonight
LIlah TOV!

HELLOOOO :D

I keep forgetting to update my blog D:

However, my daddy likes to read these....so I am trying to remember to do this

JUST FOR YOU DADDY :D


School is going really well, classes are awesome...the food is awesome..oh and so are the people!

Ok.
I saw inception last night.
i don't know how to explain
how CONFUSED i was.

anywhoooo.

today in my writing class, the teacher had us go around and say our names and a couple of things about us.

so I said.

My name is Rebecca, I like glitter, butterflies, and Jack Skellington.

i wish you saw her face..
it kinda looked liek this.





pretty epic, eh?

She likes butterflies and LOVES nightmare before christmas.
automatic A in the class!
ahhaa. just kidding.

but seriosuly :]

okies. thats it for now! i have to go socialize and make some more friends!